Bad Translation

I was driving around town yesterday, listening to FM 103.1. A spot came on about E. Coli, with this VO couple going on about how E. Coli had all these great health products at my local drug store, and how E. Coli was going to save me money. E. Coli cosmetics? That's quite a mental picture. All I could think was that somebody must have been really shit-faced when they came up with this campaign (cue rimshot).

At first I assumed it was one of those jokey, millennial PSAs, you know, for kids...where we were gonna learn about why we should wash our hands, and how cool it was to not have diarrhea, and that E. Coli causes 1000's of cases of hurling a year and can even kill you, dude! But as I listened more carefully, I realized that I was terribly mistaken, or someone was. In fact, I was witnessing the huge grocery/drugstore chain Albertsons touting their latest discount health brand, "Equaline", which hit the markets in late 2004 at 25,000 locations in 37 states.

Wow. A line of health products that sounds like a deadly food-borne bacteria!
Perhaps "Equaline" wasn't the best mnemonic choice for radio. And perhaps I'm over-reacting a bit. But I also learned (via Google) that 'equiline' is also the name of a certain type of "horse estrogen" formerly used in menopause medications. Maybe it's just me, but I would have come up with something else - like "Goodforyas" or "Medicuddles". Nevertheless, it seems Equaline sales are up, and their packaging certainly makes things easy for worldwide brand integration. The only issue in the future might be if people actually do start hearing PSAs for (or rather, against) E. Coli: "For relief of symptoms associated with E. Coli, be sure to pick up some Equaline!"

Say it ten times fast, you'll see what I mean.

SEE AN EQUALINE RELEASE